I finished reading the manuscript today. Good thing I like rewriting. I’ll be doing a lot of it.
I’ve convinced myself that at this stage with This Dame For Hire I didn’t feel so horrified by what I’d written. I’d sold “Dame” on the first 100 pages so it wasn’t that I had a “will I sell it or won’t I?” problem. In fact, I don’t believe I had any problem with it. But somewhere I know that can’t be true. One, I would’ve been worried about the rest of the book being as well done as those 100 pages. Still, I don’t think it was this big of a hodgepodge. Hodgepodge? I’ve never used that expression in my life. It’s obviously out of anxiety. Two, the first of any series is the easiest, I think.
This novel is also pre-sold. But it can’t be a mess. And I don’t want it to be. My first reader will help me a lot. And then I have a very fine editor at Ballantine, so I know I’ll get help there if I need it.
But most of all I have to calm down. It’ll work out. It always does.
Sometimes better than others.